Whoever Said Troubles Come in Threes, Can't Count

Let me introduce you to my life these last few days.

Trouble Number One: Our trailer has sprung a leak. Just in case you ever decide to own a trailer, know this: If you open the door of the trailer for the first time in the spring and immediately start to retch because of the smell, you have a leak. Wet carpet. Closed trailer. You get the idea.

During our two week stay, we searched and searched for the source of the leak, but couldn't find it. And now friends are saying things like “ Yea. That’s common in trailers.”

Despite climbing on the roof and under the trailer, we couldn't find the leak. We looked on dry days. We - well, Fred - donned rain gear and looked on wet days. No luck. In the end, we came home and left it leaking. And worrying me – a lot.

Trouble Number Two: Saturday, I decided to hike. It was a ‘car-shuffle’ hike. My car was left at the end point while I rode with others to the start point. . Once the hike was finished, I drove the drivers back to the little gravel side road in the woods to get their cars. They headed one way, I, the other. A few seconds later, I heard a thump, then a whooshing sound for a few seconds.
“I’ve run over a branch, I thought. “The leaves are brushing against the wheel well.”
When the sound stopped, the road became very bumpy.

“Boy, do they need to grade this road.” is what went through my head. Even when I reached pavement – about 3 Ks later – for any of you that know about these ‘Don’t drive on flat tire things’, it was still bumpy. Slow learner, me, the light finally went on. I pulled over and looked. Boy! That tire was in shreds. It had blown. And the rim didn’t look too good either.

Being a one cell phone family, and not having that one with me, I walked to the nearest house
(Such fun - a little walk after a three hour hike) to use the phone and call Fred. Once he arrived, the two of us attempted to change the tire.

Turns out my spare is under the van. Some tricky little maneuver is meant to lower the cable that attaches the spare, and then the tire is supposed to drop down. Of course that didn’t happen. There we were, at the side of the road, Fred under the car, me standing behind him reading the manual. “Step one says to…”

The thought that ran through my head was “A good blogger would have brought the camera”
Finally, we gave up, put Fred’s spare tire on my car and drove home.

All of which made me late for the most important part of my day. An afternoon of knitting and dessert at a friend’s house, to meet her knitting friend from Nova Scotia. And no, I didn’t take my camera there either.

Trouble Number Three: Sunday night, my modem failed. I have had high speed internet for a couple of years now and in my opinion - but I’m no Tecky - I have needed a new modem from day one. The Teckies at the help desk must think I’m a stalker, I have called so often. Being just the customer (Do they treat all customers as retarded two year olds?) I couldn’t convince them the modem should be replaced.

But last night the modem was dead. Two –not four lights. Dead. I called. Twenty minutes on hold and my portable phone died. Two dead technological wonders. I set the phone to charge and the alarm for 7 am. The early bird gets the worm sort of thinking.

That was a good idea. Except, once I convinced the Tecky I needed a modem, he told me to call back after 8:30 when the sales department would be open. Apparently the Tecky can say “Yes the modem is dead.” But he can’t say “Yes, we will send you a new modem.” He was kind enough, though, to program my computer for dial-up so I could post my blog while I wait for the new modem to come.

Trouble Number Four: While I waited for 8:30 to roll around, I decided to start a batch of bread. While shopping last week, I had purchased - at breath taking cost - a ten pound bag of Organic Red Fife Heritage Flour. “Won’t that make great bread?” I thought. My recipe starts with one cup of water. Ten minutes later you add an additional two cups.

I have a one cup measure and a four cup measure. I got the one cup right, but still aggravated about my dead modem, I filled the four cup measure to the top and dumped it in.
“Mmmmmm Must be really humid today” I thought.

Once I realized my mistake, I decided I had two options. Throw out what I’d started, or make a double batch. I decided to go for double. Up to my ears in bread dough, I heard Fred get up. “Good Morning Sweetie” he says. I look at him and say
“You might not want to talk to me today.”

Trouble Number Five: With the bread finally set to rise, I decided to check my emails. I tried to dial up but the system told me it had no dial tone.

“Of course, dummy,” I said to self, “You have to unplug the modem and plug the phone line into the computer.”

Done. Still no dial tone. Check the phone. No dial tone. Check the bedroom phone. No dial tone. Check the basement phone. No dial tone. Check the neighbour’s phone. Dial tone. Mmmmmm.

I called the 611 number to India. The rep set me up with a repair appointment tomorrow; I’m impressed with the service, until I’m told that if the problem is inside the house, there will be a $79.50 charge. Since our neighbour’s phone works, I’m pretty sure our problem is inside the house.

I gasped, which cued the rep to try and sell me a ‘protection plan’. Cost? $96 per year. But if I signed up today, I wouldn’t have to pay the $79.50 tomorrow. Since I’m pretty sure I’ll be in the loony bin by tomorrow, they won’t be able to get money from me anyway. I declined.

Trouble Number Six: I told Fred that Bell was coming tomorrow and would want to get at the box where the line comes into the house. That would be the box that Fred ‘boxed’ over when he re-did the laundry room. When he finished sawing, he came to the den to try and ‘fix’ the phone himself. This did help, as we at least determined that the computer was the problem, not the phone. I called India again. Repair appointment canceled. $79.50 saved.

Trouble Number ?? I’ve lost count. I called the computer Tecky again.
”Why do I have no dial tone when I plug the phone line into the computer? I asked.
He told me I had plugged the phone line into the wrong spot on the back of the computer. I told him it was the only spot available.
He asked many, many questions. None of them related to my IQ. Nice Tecky.
Then he mildly asked, if there might be another spot to plug in the line at the very bottom of the computer.

OMIGOSH!!! Who would ever think to look way down there?

I’m going to have a drink.